"And what else.........."

"And what else.........."

Those who conceal their sins do not prosper, but those who confess and forsake them obtain mercy. ~ Proverbs 28:13

    There was always one thing I feared when I would sit in the confessional and I guess that one thing is the reason why I did not sit there as often as I should have. That one thing was “What if the Priest says “ Your sins are not forgiven”. I was always afraid of that but last week when I sat in the confessional there was something said that I never heard from any Priest or even heard that it was said to anyone else by a Priest. After I said my sins the Priest said “ And what else?” 

    I was in shock and yet even more shocked as more things came from my mouth. Then again He said “ And what else” and again more came out.  Then came a full dialogue between the Priest and myself. Well, it was more of Him talking and me saying “Yes Father, I understand Father, Your right Father”.... For once there was nothing more I could say. I was absolved and I left in shock of what went on. 

   It was not that I was hiding things from confession but more that I tend to speak in generalities and do not go into specifics. It is like when you order that meal in the drive up. “ I will take a number 4 with a coke”. You do not say what it is just the number and your set and they understand. Its the same in confession for me its like “ I committed 2, 4 and 6. (Do not bother to check commandments I just made the number up :) ) Then you are off to do your penance. It did not work that way this time. 

   It is not that I do not know my sins, I am fully aware of them but when they are put in categories and placed under headings it takes away some of the reality of them. Yet, this time when I heard them out loud it become a new reality of the life I was living. It was not a holy life that I wanted to be living. I did not say that to the priest but he said things that would help to be living that holy life. It was what I needed to hear. 

  This all happened at the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington D.C. This will be important to know for the next part. As much as I knew He was right I started to doubt it. Maybe thats just what He does and says to everyone. So, I let it go as just a coincidence. Then he next night I decided to go to church back home for prayer for Vocations. There was a Seminarian from the Diocese who is assigned there for the summer. He got up to do a talk and says He is from the Seminary in DC and spoke about what He did to lead a more Holy life before entering the seminary. There is no shock to anyone, I bet, that it was everything that the priest said to me the day before in the confessional.  I guess God wanted to make sure that the message just did not stay in DC but made the message come to my home from DC without my help. 

    I left that night on top of the world. Thinking of what and how I am going to go about the Holy Life that I really want from my heart and soul. It is in these moments where I stop and say out loud “ God really does pay attention to everything and wants the best for me”. Things will need to shift in my life for more of those things that I need to do. I know in the end both God and myself will be happier. 

    Lesson learned : Be 100% open in confession. Do not try and lump things together to make it easier but truly listen to what has gone on so one can correct those things in the present and future.

Until tomorrow, God Bless, and may you open your mouth so the truth, the whole truth, will come forth and open your eyes to the life you live.